not for my faith, but for the hateful things other people say in the name of the One i call Creator.
i see videos like this and i want to vomit. i watch them go viral via social media and it infuriates me. i want to scream at the top of my lungs, "we're not all like that!!!" heck, i would argue that an overwhelming majority of us don't support that kind of behavior or belief.
and we all don't do the whole "hate the sin, love the sinner" or the "God loves you and so do i, but you need to change who you are in order to join us in heaven one day" crap either. that's just passive aggressive prejudice. that's maybe even worse in my opinion than the outright hate speech.
but that doesn't make the hate speech any less hurtful.
tonight i found myself in tears after watching this video of a pastor telling his congregation that my lesbian sisters and gay brothers should be put into areas surrounded by electrical fences so they could die out over time.
i am so tired of hearing certain christians use any scriptural argument to justify their prejudice against the LBGT community, but the absolute worst is the pro-creation case (like that particular pastor was using) to "be fruitful and multiply" (gen 1.28).
for those of you who do not know, when i was in college a doctor informed me that my chances of having children are less than ideal. a lot less. as in, probably not happening.
now, i don't pretend to have any clue what my friends experience when they hear/see/feel other people emotionally (or physically, i've been the shoulder to cry on through those personal stories too) spit on them because of their sexual or gender identity. what i do understand, though, is the heart stopping humiliation that occurs when you hear a pastor tell you that you are worthless - to society, to creation, to God - because of how God made you.
i didn't choose it. i didn't have a traumatic experience that caused me to rebel. this wasn't a result of my family environment or my parents' child-rearing skills or any of the other reasons ignorant people make for homosexuality, the most infamous reason for couples not pro-creating.
God made me this way. and yet some folks say that i am of no worth to God and that there is no use in my loving another person because it will never result in the birth of a child. (although they would never say that to me or to the elderly couple in the third pew who just recently married last month, they only say it to my homosexual friends.)
you and i both know that there are millions of orphans in the world, desperately in need of a loving family to call their own. one day, perhaps, my husband i will bring that growing number down by one or two, but i ask the people with the pro-creation argument against homosexuality - what makes us any different from gay or lesbian couples?
if you haven't seen lisa ling's show "our america: pray the gay away?", it is a really interesting watch. the show highlights christian movements founded on the belief that lesbian women and gay men should suppress those "urges" and live a heterosexual life - organizations like exodus international. the show also highlights christian movements founded on the principle of giving gay and lesbian christians space to be authentically both christian and gay or lesbian - organizations like the naming project.
in her interview on the view, lisa ling makes the comment: "[gay and lesbian christians] are condemned by the church (for being gay) and they're also condemned by a lot of gay people for being christian...but they are not condemned by God."
and i wept.
because this isn't how it's supposed to be. i can't imagine that this is what God intended for creation, for the people called "beloved".
people from both sides ostracize each other. they put each other in small-minded glass houses.
both perpetuate the hate.
i'm sure they have their reasons. and i'm sure they are seemingly sensible, always deeply personal reasons too. gay men who have been called filthy by people of the church. christians who feel called to proselytize their understanding of the "right" interpretation of scripture.
christians have the privileged majority, or at least they have the louder voice and vote (as evidenced recently in north carolina). so christians must be the first to step up to stop the hate, to forgive and ask forgiveness. those in privilege always have to be the first to surrender their power.
unfortunately, the hate cycle will continue even long after our government and our churches finally see the light though. because the hurt caused by hatred on both sides runs deep into the core of our beings. and that hurt takes time to heal. this is something our grandchildren will still be dealing with, just like our generation is still dealing with racism.
all this said, i continue to stick with the church, because i believe it will change. because i believe people will change. because i aim to be part of that change. i stick with the church because i believe that one day we will actually be the church Jesus envisioned so many years ago.
