day thirty

"i issued an order calling in all the wise men of babylon, so they could tell me what my dream meant. when all the magicians, enchanters, astrologers, and fortune-tellers came in, i told them the dream, but they could not tell me what it meant.  at last daniel came in before me, and i told him the dream. (he was named belteshazzar after my god, and the spirit of the holy gods is in him.)

~ daniel 4.1-8, new living translation

when i was a little girl, i had this reoccurring nightmare.  it was loosely based on shel silverstein's 'the googies are coming'.  in my dream, i would wake up to the sound of an old witch's laughter.  i would go to my window and see the dark figure riding across the sky on her broom.  behind her, a huge bag filled with children punching and kicking to get out.  eventually, she would notice me watching, stop mid-flight, look me in the eyes and tell me that she was coming for me.  luckily, i always woke up before she got the window.

shortly after katie moved out and i was left as the sole resident of the gowell cottage, i had a terrible night terror.  in the dream, i woke up to the feeling of someone in the room.  quickly, i notice a man standing at the end of the bed, watching me.  even worse, i feel the weight of another person on my bed.  it is another man.  he is lying behind me and he begins to tell me all of the ways he plans to hurt me.  i can feel the hot breath of his words on the back of my neck.  i can feel the rise and fall of his lungs on my back.  suddenly, there is a noise downstairs and the two men flee.  i hear the pounding of their feet as they rush down the stairs and through the house.  the first time i had this dream i woke in a panic.  i was paralyzed by my fear.  i couldn't tell what was reality.  the dream had felt so real.  i didn't dare to move from my bed.  i didn't want to make a sound.  eventually, i reached for my cell phone and called a friend who talked me down from the height of the terror.  i've had the dream several times since then, but now i have pete and i know that he would never let anyone get into the house without my knowing it.

nightmares can be truly terrifying experiences.  your heart can race, your palms can sweat, your muscles can tire.  so when you wake, it is that much harder to decipher reality.  it is truly amazing how the mind can work...

similarly, joyous dreams have the same effect.  have you ever awakened from a dream just to wish you could go right back to sleep and pick up where you left off?  it was so perfect, so wonderful that you would rather live in your dreams than wake to reality.  you wake up, your breathing is easy and the corners of your mouth hurt as if you've been smiling for hours.  then you realize that you have to get ready for just another mundane day of the same old routine... 

unfortunately, i don't have an interpreter like daniel to tell me the meaning of my dreams. i guess i'll just have to wait until i'm face to face with the Ultimate to ask that question...